Commissioned

Deliberations 4 – Best Commission (2016)

This 2016 Baldies Awards deliberation is on “Best Commission”! We had a lot of great commissioned podcasts last year. Find out what made our top ten as Baldy nominees!

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Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982)

Special thanks to Josh “Anubus21” Wilson for the conclusion of his three podcast trilogy (previously Screamers and PCU), Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.  Arguably the greatest Trek film of all time, and featuring the unquestionably greatest Trek movie villain, Wrath holds up like a champ.  Featuring terrifying ear worms, a broad range of quality Shatnerian acting, Chekov screaming, and Ricardo Montalbán’s impressive old man chest, we try to look at the film through both critical and nostalgic lenses.

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The Dark Knight (2008)

Special thanks to a bunch of Aron’s gaming buddies, namely Hobbsam, CLUSTER_F, SheIsGeeky, TONYDETH, Jormagund, and Meatplow77 for coming together to commission perhaps the greatest superhero movie of all time, Batman: The Dark Knight. Featuring a Heath Ledger performance that won him a posthumous Oscar, this film has a unique blend of superb writing and direction, dazzling action, well grounded performance, and just enough heart to make it a modern classic. Jim and A.Ron talk about the Christopher Nolan Batman trilogy in general, and the Batman himself before lavishing praise upon the film, and of course, poking around for the few problems the film has.

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PCU (1994)

Special thanks to Josh “anubus21” Wilson again for yet another commission (he also is responsible for the recent Screamers), this time he decided to troll us by making us watch the terrible “Jeremy Piven goes to college” movie, PCU. We figured it was only fair to troll him back by tearing the movie a new one. We don’t think the movie is particularly funny, it’s message is bad, and it’s full of unlikable characters with murky motivations and goals beyond throwing the ultimate rager and wishing minorities and vegetarians would just, you know, chill already. Its lone bright spot is that mid-movie, George Clinton personally pilots the Mothership as he drops a righteous funk bomb on the film, but even ordinance that powerful couldn’t stop the monstrous Piven.

All in all, a fairly successful troll all around. Thanks for your support, Josh, and… enjoy?

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Natural Born Killers (1994)

Jason decided to tag his wife Aime back for the movies (Transformers, Toxic Avenger) she’d commissioned for him over Christmas, by having us chat about her personal favorite movie, Oliver Stone’s 1994 film, Natural Born Killers. We found this movie to be wonderfully cast (Woody Harrelson, Juliette Lewis, Robert Downey, Jr., Tommy Lee Jones, Tom Sizemore, among others) and fully insane in it’s direction, visuals, editing, and message, and thus spent about half our time talking about the film itself, and the other half pondering the human condition. Jason, Aime, hope you two crazy love birds enjoy this commission, and if either of you start talking about being the god of your world, back out of the room slowly. Make no sudden movements.

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The Toxic Avenger (1984)

Merry Christmas, Jason Miller! Your wife, Aime thought it would be a nice present to commission you a pair of podcasts to open beneath the tree. This is one of them, 1984’s cult horror classic, “The Toxic Avenger”. Directed by Michael Herz and “starring” Mitch Cohen, Mark Torgl, Andree Maranda, it’s a work of pure cinematic insanity of over the top and cheaply filmed gore, sex, violence, and sexual violence. We discuss Troma films in general, pollution, dick punching, and much more as we attempt to review a movie that defies criticism.

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Transformers: The Movie (1986)

Amee Miller commissioned Transformers the Movie as a Christmas present for her beloved husband Jason. Featuring the voice talents of Leonard Nimoy, Orsen Wells, Petter Cullen, and Scatman Crothers, the movie certainly lives up to it’s billing as “beyond your wildest imagination.” For example, I’d never imagine an underwater chase scene involving muscle cars, mentally challenged dinosaur robots leading a populist revolt against injustice, a microscope being used as a telescope, or Weird Al Yankovic’s “Dare to Be Stupid” being used in an all-robot dance number. Maybe my imagination is broken or something.

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Black Mirror – Season 1

Special thanks to Kristen, who commissioned the first season of the BBC’s trippy futuristic social horror anthology, “Black Mirror”, for her husband Chris. Merry Christmas, Chris!  We had a great time watching and an even greater time bantering about the crazy situations depicted on the Mirror. From pig porking to winning an argument with your loved one that you might rather lose, we try to tackle it all. Thanks again Kristen and Chris!

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Screamers (1995)

Special thanks to Josh Wilson who commissioned the 1995 cult sci-fi movie, “Screamers”. Starring Peter “Robocop” Weller, it works as both a goofy b-grade science fiction flick and a semi-serious work based on a short story by no less than Phillip K. Dick. It punches well above it’s weight in terms of concept, set, and costume design, but then surrounds Weller with below replacement value actors such as “Poor Man’s Bill Paxton” and “Homeless Man’s Val Kilmer” with mixed results. Still, it managed to provide both laughs and scares, and we feel we enjoyed it in the spirit it was intended.

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The Voices (2014)

Julie Webster of “Teeth” commissioning fame/infamy is back again with another movie to bend our noodles. This one a criminally overlooked Ryan Reynolds movie, “The Voices”. Under the direction of Academy Award winner Marjane Satrapi, and joined by co-star Anna Kendrick, Reynolds really comes out swinging as a poorly understood young man with non-existant social skills just trying to find happiness in life. Unfortunately, for reasons both nature and nurture, his search is in vain, and the movie spirals down an ever increasing dark path. An impressive movie, and one worth watching if you don’t think Ryan Reynolds is capable of any kind of nuanced, interesting work. Just be warned, this movie is pitch black, and very uncomfortable in places.

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